Confronting My Fears of Confrontation

I don’t like confrontation.  Now, the act of actually confronting someone doesn’t scare me.  Once I get in there and really start sharing my feelings like I am in some AA meeting, I am fine with it.  I am more than okay to rip one out and let whoever I am upset with know how I feel.  What really gets me in trouble is initiating that type of conversation.  I don’t know why, but the idea of just going up to someone and just letting out a bunch of negative emotions makes me want to go crawl up a tree like a cat and not want to come down.  It’s that initial  door knock that is really terrifying; I never know what I am going to face behind that door.  The anticipation builds up in my brain and starts bubbling out of my ears while I wait those 20 crucial seconds before the conversation starts.  When I start discussing my feelings, however, I realize that everything is fine.  The bubbling brew of my fright evaporates, and I am just left with a good conversation that makes me feel happy with myself when finished.  Then I think, “hey maybe this wasn’t such a hard thing after all.”  I’ve slowly been learning, and growing with each confrontation I have performed, and I realize that honestly, a confrontation is just a serious conversation, and conversations really aren’t all that scary.